Friday, January 16, 2009

Well, we spotted her...

In Walmart the other day, where else? The one woman who broke the most fashion decency rules it is possible to break at one time.

Bless the poor woman. She was in her late forties or early fifties and plump, which added insult to injury.

She was wearing:

*tight black leggins (not under a tunic or skirt)
*stiletto heals
*a tight, low-cut, horizontal-stripe black and white top
*large hoop earrings (with another peircing at the top of her ear)
*raccoon eye makeup

Maybe she was trying to feel young, or maybe she's lost track of her age and weight, or her mirror fell off the back of her door... I don't know. But, I must've looked like some kind of bobble head following the equally strong inclinations to stare, cringe, and look away. I know, it's awful, isn't it? I don't mean to be judgemental or unkind, really, but, goodness, a woman her age, especially, should know better. I was embarassed for her. It's bad enough when teeny boppers dress imodestly and inappropriately. It's still not right, but I can at least chalk it up to their being young and, um, unwise. I can assume they don't know better and I can blame our decadent society. Or their mothers. But, honestly. A woman who is old enough to remember Jackie Kennedy... For shame! She should know better.

These kinds of things always pose a dilemma for me. I don't want to teach my children to be unkind. I don't want to behave like a gossip. But I also want it to be very clear what is and is not appropriate attire and behaviour for my children. When we are away from home, we are assaulted on every side by every kind of offense, from other people's poor judgment to their blatant immorality and I don't want any of it to become commonplace for my family. I don't want them to be blind to it. But I also don't want them to grow up to be self righteous snots. So, I try to preface our little cautionary talks with certain caveats about charity, and hope the lessons learned override the fact that, yes, we are talking about people. And these other people are souls, as precious to God as they are.

So we try hard to judge the offense and not the offender. It's a balancing act!

Following, some lesson-inducing sightings:
*Pajamas in public
*Multiple peircings
*Excessive tattoos
*Mohawks or other hairdos calculated to draw negative attention
*The habit of picking up a ringing phone and talking instead of ringing up the order of the customer in front of you
*Skateboarding down public access stairways
*Jaywalking through traffic
*Being a child alone in a public place

What bad examples worry you?


Natalie said...

Wafflers! I can't stand them, but unfortunately have a brother and SIL who are constant wafflers. You know,those people who always ride the fence and don't take a stand for what they believe, and change their mind with what is "popular" at the time. You can't count of them to keep their word with anything. I have also noticed that wafflers tend to be very selfish and will do what is in the best interest for them, not necessairly their family, community or society in general. I think these people are bad examples which is why I try my best to lead a good life with morals, values, and principles (even when it isn't popular). I really like your post today. =)

Anne said...

Hey Lisa, there's a name for women like that..I think it has something to do with a certain profession..JK! Hate it too! At least when they are old like that there's really not much of a chance of sin, just disgust. When they are pretty and young and do it, that stinks!

SuzyQ said...

This is a tough one!
For me I worry about my kids being exposed to mean, unkind, or just plain angry behaviour that seems to have become so common place these days.
I try to teach my children to understand the reasons behind people's behaviour like you do. It just saddens me that the world seems to be so much more angry and confrontational than ever before.
Okay, okay, I'm going to shock you now Lisa (please still like me, please still like me lol ;)
But, yes as a teenager I was a little bit rebelious and had pink hair, piercings the whole works. I also have three pretty good sized tattoos!! I know I know lol! But the thing is I was really a nice person. I just looked a little odd for a while ;0)
There were lots of reasons why I went through that phase, which I won't go into but it's something I learned from I think.
The main thing I's worry about if my kids ever wanted to change their looks so,um, well, radically lol, is the reasons behind why they wanted to.
Great Post Lisa. Lot's to think on :0)

Lisa said...

Oo, good one, Natalie. This is a thing that goes deep and affects every part of your life if you're a habitual waffler. Yikes! Definitely one to warn against, I agree!

Anne ~ Isn't it just sad? Either way, young or old, I feel sorry for the gal. But, I have to warn the kids against them, too...

Suzy ~ I agree! You want to shield the children (and, heck, myself, too!) from the hostility and hatred out there. But, then, you have to teach them how to handle it, too. It is hard.

And, goodness, Suzy! How could I EVER like you less than I do! I like you more every day! &:o) I'm guilty of my own list of indiscretions from my young days, too. &:o) I think we all have a few, whatever the reason.

Personally, I dont mind a couple of tattoos (My dear grandfather, a Coastie, had a couple on each of his arms and I always thought they were pretty neat), but sometimes, you just know when someone has covered their bodies with tattoos in order to attract attention in a bad way. You know the skulls and dragons and such... Ew.

I think you're exactly right, though ~ You have to worry more about the reasons that a person would do such a thing, more than the thing itself.

Marie said...

Men with beer bellies who wear singlets, glasses and a pony tail and think they are God's gift..the 1960's ended a LONGGGGG time ago guys Get over it! LOL

People who try and queue jump..I simply look at them and snap, 'dont even think about it!' They always slink off.

People who block the shopping ailes with their trolleys and 'catch up' on the local gossip while there is a growing queue who are waiting patiently for them to wrap up their convo. I always remind them that there is a reason why PHONES were invented and suggest they go home and USE EM!

Impatient people...hmmm *strikes that one off my list*...I'm guilty! LOL!

Mobile phones in cinema's and people who have a convo while I have PAID money to WATCH the movie and not listen in to their rather trite conversation. Switch your mobiles off!

I am with Natalie I cannot stand wafflers they literally dont know if they are coming or going and my thought is PLEASE GO! Dont let the door hit you on the way out! LOL!

Ah, dear what a brilliant post Lisa I feel so much better now I have vented LOL!

Peace and JOY to you hon:)

Marie xooxoxoxo

Mama to much! said...

I hate the tabloids and magazines at the register lines!

Mama to much! said...

oh, yeah...and I can't stand the 60's gone wrong style. And clothes that have seams below the breast line. The maternity style for all. yuck!

MightyMom said...

well, you didn't mention a butt crack blinding you so at least that was covered!!

Natalie said...

Another thing that sets a bad example and can become common is being late. I absolutely hate being late and being made to wait. I know it is hard with kids, dogs, and who knows what else going on, but I like to think being late can be avoided in most situations. People who are constantly late just tell me that they think their time is more important than someone elses. I prefer to be early and wait than be in a hassled rush.

Growing up, we had a family who always showed up for Mass 10-15 minutes late, but (I guess their self-induced penance) they always walked to the front of the church and sat in the front pew. Good family so nobody ever "got-on" to them for being late each week. I hate that it was just expected of them though.

GrandmaK said...

Don't know how I missed this but it is way to funny! I must have missed the bus! Thanks for the lift!! BIG :) Cathy