Keep Calm and Make a List

 Top Ten Facts of Empty Nesting

(According to Dan and Lisa)

1) Anything amiss around here, like lost reading glasses, or water tracked across the floor, or cabinets left open -- is blamed on the dog. Don't feel sorry for him, though; he's good with it. Whoever does the blaming always loves up on him like a co-conspirator. We're starting to think Dawsey may actually be leaving cabinets open so he can get belly rubs.

2) We can, for the first time in our lives, actually walk across the mudroom without tripping over shoes. It's weird. Now we just trip over air out of habit.

3) Sunday afternoons, which used to be all about trying to get a moment of peace away from the hoards of children -- are now exercises in getting time with our children. We brag to each other about how many of the kids we talked to or texted with on Sunday afternoons. (It's also open house for our dear girls from Mater Dei's St. Philomena boarding house right down the street!)

4) In our immediate stores, we now have less food -- but better food. At least to us -- because we eat a lot of salads. There's a certain amount of regret, though, that we couldn't buy the choice cuts of steak we enjoy now for all ten kids all those years, but, hey: they can buy their own now, right? And they'll appreciate it all the more! (I said regret, not guilt. ;) )

5) Neither of us can remember what we've told each of the kids, so everyone gets the same information from both of us or one of us several times -- or not at all. (Sorry, kids.)

6) We can get ready for Church and legitimately be out the door in fifteen minutes. But we usually take a half hour. (Imagine.)

7) We are practically paralyzed nowadays by having to entertain by ourselves, we
're so used to having the well-oiled machinery of the kid-team kick into motion before an event. We never used to even have to say what needed to be done; the bottom five children, most especially, were like high end caterers. We miss that! If anyone wonders why we don't entertain as much... that's why!

8) Laundry once a week and usually only two loads. At the height of highly-blessed parenting career,
when everyone was home, I did at least two loads a day, every day but Sunday. Now when the two youngest boys are home, it goes back up to two loads, two or three times a week. 

9) We've started to lose our goalie-like parenting reflexes -- physically, anyway. If one of the toddler grandbabies is falling off the couch, there'd better be a parent or auntie or uncley nearby. But if you want a situationally pertinent lecture on any given topic, Dan and I, both, are still quick on the draw, kids. We'll be passing around the lectures on our deathbeds, count on it.

10) We miss the crazy busy days of big-family parenting like a waitress misses a St. Valentine's Day Saturday night shift. Through the thick of it, we were so busy that we were forced into top form, and the whole thing passed by crazy fast -- we barely had time to catch our breath -- and there were tons of near-misses and goofs, but it was kinda fun, too, and there was lots of love and tender moments -- and, throughout, great tips -- little perks! -- but we're really really glad to put our feet up now that we're done with it.